There’s an old joke floating around. There was a group of Republicans and Democrats standing on the banks of the Potomac River. Suddenly they noticed a man crying for help out in the river about 100 feet from the bank.



There’s an old joke floating around. There was a group of Republicans and Democrats standing on the banks of the Potomac River. Suddenly they noticed a man crying for help out in the river about 100 feet from the bank.
Both parties jumped into action to save him.
The Republicans threw him 75ft of rope and yelled swim to the rope.
The Democrats threw him 150 ft of rope but didn’t hold on to the end of the rope.
Obviously neither approach saved the man.
No doubt if the Independent party had been there they would be criticizing how the other parties handled to situation while the poor fellow drowned.
So everyone complains but no one offers an alternative.
Well how about this.
We form a new party. Let’s call it the American Party of Decency, Simplification and Common Sense Practices.
Members from all existing parties would be welcome to join as long as they accepted the new party’s platform.
That platform is as follows:
All questions presented to candidates/politicians shall be answered with a   simple “YES” or “NO”. Violation to this rule would result in the candidate having to drive a beige colored 1982 Chevrolet Citation for the rest of their life.
Candidates/politicians shall speak in practical language.
Using terms like “thinking out of the box” or “revisit the issue” etc. will be prohibited. Violations to this rule would result in candidates having to fly on airlines employing pilots that make only consensus based decisions.
The fear of political correctness shall not cause us to have to “talk in tongues” to each other about issues. It is what it is…….. simple as that.
Violations to this rule would result in not being able to say it when your mouth is full of it.
All government transactions shall be completed on one page forms. This includes license plate renewals.
Violations to this rule would result in inheriting the 1982 Chevrolet mentioned above and paying for repairs to meet the safety inspection process of the state of California.
Random acts of kindness by individuals shall be tax deductible.  
With the exception of miracles and tragedies there will be only four categories to describe events and actions “a good thing”, a bad thing” “the right thing” and “not significant” enough to fit into one of the proceeding three. 
Well at best I hope I have provided a little bit of humor. We really only have two choices in life you’re either an optimist or a pessimist so hey “Buck up friends” we still live in the greatest country on the face of the earth.   
John Solomon, Gravois Mills